Sometimes, finding one’s wings in the world, means creating distance from and within family. There are times when being close-knit can actually produce unwanted strife and the plans God has for those members can’t come to fruition while that strife remains. It doesn’t mean family ceases to care for each other, it only means that room is created for the individual strengths and visions God has granted, to be carried out. If the tents are too close together, the chords can’t be lengthened.
God says in Isaiah 54:2-3 Enlarge the place of thy tent, and let them stretch forth the curtains of thine habitations: spare not, lengthen thy cords, and strengthen thy stakes; 3 For thou shalt break forth on the right hand and on the left; and thy seed shall inherit the Gentiles, and make the desolate cities to be inhabited.
For some families, doing as Abram and Lot did tends to cause more strife than what was there before. Those doing the separating are seen as troublemakers and once the separation is complete, can be seen as outcasts by the rest of the family. But if all parties are able to see the benefits as Abram and Lot did, then the separation can be amicable and God’s purposes can continue in each one’s life. It is hinted at in Genesis 13, that Lot, while agreeing to the separation, may not have chosen his new home wisely. Those familiar with his story will agree that he could have chosen better in the end. But as far as family goes, he agreed with Abram that there was no need for the strife going on to continue, and space was made accordingly.
We all need space from each other from time to time. As family, we can get all up in each other’s business sometimes to the detriment of continued healthy relations. But when we give each other space to grow, be and engage in all that God has for each of us, then the strife ceases and directions become more clear. God showed Abram the land once again, and once again encouraged him to travel its length and breadth to explore and discover it. His decree didn’t end because the family needed to give each other space. God’s decree carried right on.
Some of us need to let go of family members and let God lead them into a larger space where they can lengthen their chords and strengthen their stakes and enlarge their tents. God has a plan for them much bigger than the tight corner they are in now. Let them go and see what God does with them. . .
